Hi all,
So I have had a pretty traumatic past 2 weeks in my ratty keeping world.
It started by me returning to a horrible, blood covered cage..over my walls,carpet..horrible. Through my past experience I presumed a rare fight, having checked everyone over I found no injuries so settled that it may have been a nicked ear, which like a papercut, can bleed ALOT and make everything look worse. Not nice to clean up but hoped it was over with.
A day later I came down to the same scene, affirming to me that the chance of a 2nd fight was unlikely and something medical was going on. Again, couldnt find anyone to diagnose. Happened again on the Friday.
After speaking to my breeder friends I started a process of elimination and set up a smaller cage with the idea of pairing them to try isolate who..then identify what.
Ironically had a clear weekend and started to hope whatever it may have been had resolved. Woke up Wednesday to the same scene around the smaller cage and thought I had identified who and put together a plan of action. I swapped one rat out and placed the ratties brother in with him as it was their 2 yr birthday. They both enjoyed cake and seemed well.
Thursday I came down to the worse mess yet and the ratty i'd placed in the previous night gone to the bridge. It knocked me back and ill save the details but it was not nice. Having spoken to my ratty people they agree I did everything I could and it sounded like a pulmonary embolism..blood clots and blood on the lungs, nothing a vet could have done or predicted.
I returned his brother to my main cage and he was fine Friday. Yesterday I came down to find him withdrawn, refusing food, water, just lying there. I spent the day trying to syringe water him, feed, just sat holding him, he slept in my arms, on my shoulder, he just wanted to be by me. I started to believe he was grieving, which rats can do...he took a turn in the evening, possibly a stroke and lost the use of his back legs. This morning I had to make the call to help him to the bridge. He'd given up.
To lose two brothers, in the space of three days...after all the trauma of the symptoms and to watch essentially my ratty just give up the will to live has hit me pretty hard. I'm not "used to" grief but I have been keeping small animals a while now the short life spans I have become a little better dealing with. This is just too much and was not expected.
Together with some things personally, its making me do what we all do after a loss, ask is it worth it? Statistically, losing two so close I know is probably just cruel ironally and I have had just horrible bad luck. Just these guys were my rocks, they were older, so cuddlier, had such different personalities, special ones..I feel I have not only lost my pets but a bit of my support system.
When you question if it's worth the grief
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