can some mummys put me at ease, 3yr old starts nursery mon!

[Call me Alison]

trying her uniform on today!

hi everyone....

i'm a bit of a nervous wreck at the moment, my 3yr old daughter starts full time nursery tomorrow.

the first 3 weeks will be a couple of hours and then it will go to 9-3, it's a religious school so unfortunately it's full time.

i think i'm worried with her only turning 3 in august i've got so many anxieties with having a really bad time of it myself, she s so shy and easily upset, sounds mad but i feel physically sick having to walk her in to the school yard

could some parents please put me at ease xxx

[delbert]

im not a parent, well not to anything that is human, i have fur babies only, but my best friends little boy started last week and he LOVED it, he was a little scared at first when we dropped him off, and he cried after his mummy, but the teacher said 10 mins after we left, he was playing in the sad pit and laughing away.

He came home, full of stories and couldn't wait until he could go again.

She will be fine.
xx

[purple_x]

Aawww hun she'll be fine.
I'm not a parent yet but I work in a nursery and so I've had to deal with plenty of new starters.

Make sure YOU prepare yourself for how upset you'll be when you drop her off coz yep you'll probably be more upset that she will!
And if you leave her and she's crying dont feel bad or worry about her because after about 10 minutes she'll be fine and when you go get her at picking up time she'll be full of stories about her day.

If she's shy just let the nursery staff know so they can just keep an extra eye on her and make sure she's doing ok.

[pinkneon]

If she turned 3 in August would you be able to let her start after Christmas? When I was younger the kids born between September and March started in September, all the rest in January. She's cute by the way It may take her a little while to settle in but I'm sure she'll have lots of fun! Does the nursery have a "buddy" system? Some nurseries assign a helper to a child to help them settle in, and they stay with the child all the time in nursery to make sure they are ok. They usually only have them for a few months, but I know children who've had them for their whole time at nursery because they were really shy or quiet, or some of them had special needs or something ... Might be worth looking into. If they have one, that teacher/helper will be assigned to just your daughter, so she'll know she has someone looking out for her. Or sometimes if there are older children in the nursery they might get one of them to look after her. But as someone else said let the teachers know and I'm sure they'll look out for her. She may also take comfort in the fact that she's not the only new child and they'll all be scared too and she may even look out for one of them and forget how scared she is! I hope she has a lovely time and try not to worry too much about her! I'm sure the nursery won't mind you phoning in to see how she's doing

[billybobbs]

Awww, she looks so sweet. I have a 5 year old and a 7 year old. Their first days were nerve wracking! She will be fine though and she will love it!
My eldest started junior school this term, it was quite emotional seeing him going there with all those older kids and leaving his little brother behind in the infants. This time of year is a nightmare for all parents, your not the only one hun x

[Gamina]

Hey. No children of my own (apart from the bean currently growing in my belly) but I am a teacher and I have taught nursery, most recently last year in the intro period.

It is amazing how many parents know there children are nervous but trust me they settle in so quickly to the routine and its often harder when the parents are worried and stick around. I have seen countless number of children nervous and shy around there parents and then the parents leave they have a 5 minute cry and a cuddle from the teacher then they forget all about it and move on to the toys. After a few days they are so used to it they want there parents gone so they can play!

A good nursery will be flexible and they will know if she is coping with a few hours or if she would benefit from coming more often more quickly or indeed if it takes her a little longer than the preset plan to settle. The important thing is not to let your panic settle on her thats the worst thing we see!

Originally Posted by pinkneon

If she turned 3 in August would you be able to let her start after Christmas? When I was younger the kids born between September and March started in September, all the rest in January. She's cute by the way It may take her a little while to settle in but I'm sure she'll have lots of fun! Does the nursery have a "buddy" system? Some nurseries assign a helper to a child to help them settle in, and they stay with the child all the time in nursery to make sure they are ok. They usually only have them for a few months, but I know children who've had them for their whole time at nursery because they were really shy or quiet, or some of them had special needs or something ... Might be worth looking into. If they have one, that teacher/helper will be assigned to just your daughter, so she'll know she has someone looking out for her. Or sometimes if there are older children in the nursery they might get one of them to look after her. But as someone else said let the teachers know and I'm sure they'll look out for her. She may also take comfort in the fact that she's not the only new child and they'll all be scared too and she may even look out for one of them and forget how scared she is! I hope she has a lovely time and try not to worry too much about her! I'm sure the nursery won't mind you phoning in to see how she's doing

You will find as it is a school nursery and not a private nursery things will be a little different. There will not be as many staff per children, in a normal private nursery you can have up to 1 adult per 3/5 children in a school nursery its 1 adult to 30 but one of these will be a qualified nursery nurse and one will be a fully trained and qualified teacher. A child will only tend to get a one on one if they have special need and a statement for funding.

Also most schools are looking for the nursery class to move up into reception and so will aim to settle all children in full time within a month, its far more common in school nursery to have one intake in the September regardless of age as the children will then get a full years training before they move up in the school.

[Lougarry]

I'm sure she'll be fine, Alison. My older daughter was confident and outgoing so I had no anxieties about her, and sure enough she didn't look back! I was the one that cried. However, Nerea is shy and sensitive. When I took her for a taster session she clung to me and bawled her eyes out for 2 hours and I was a wreck. She started at 2 years and 5 months old with 3 hour sessions and despite my trepidation she was fine. She's now 3 1/2 and I was worried about her returning last week as her best friend had left to start school, but no problems.

Most kids of Scarlett's age are ready to start developing some independence and you'll probably find it a lot tougher separation-wise tan she will.

Good luck!

[TraceyH]

My son was also always the youngest in the class being born 31 August. Only problem he had with starting full-time nursery at aged 3 was missing his afternoon sleep, but he soon got used to it.

The best laugh was he was only there a week and caught chicken pox and gave me it at aged 29. He weren't ill at all but I was ill.

[Call me Alison]

thanks everybody for your lovely comments

she went today for an hour and a half and i stayed with her ( they want the parents to stay for the 1st 2 days)

she was a bit unsure at first but really seemed to enjoy it, even cried because she didn't want to go home!

i'm just really praying that she settles in and doesn't cry when i have to leave her full time!

xxx

[Lougarry]

That sounds positive - so glad she enjoyed it