You're never prepared to lose someone you hold dear even if you had plenty of time. Which with you I didn't.
You were so vibrant the night before; I heard you walking and running about in your cage, I got you out before that and we had cuddles and then I went to bed because I had to get up for college early the next morning. You poked your head out like you always do when I rush around to get ready with a disapproving look because I've disturbed you and then you go back to sleep.
I was out all day from 7am until almost 7pm and I came home feeling awful due to train delays and cold weather to find you not looking right at all.
You were sleeping outside your bedding in a weird spread out position and when I went to pick you up you were sort of cold. I warmed you up inside my jumper but when I placed you on my bed I realised something wasn't quite right. You were very wobbly and lost your balance a fair few times. I had a sinking feeling you may have had a stroke.
I tried to tempt you with some food and water but you just wouldn't. You sat on my lap for a long while before you started to gasp. I freaked and panicked because I just wasn't ready to say goodbye. You were my baby girl and I couldn't accept that you'd be gone.
You gasped and then was still and I knew I had lost you.
I wish I could have helped. But it happened so fast and you seemed okay before all of it.
You went not long after I got home so I guess you were waiting for me to say goodbye. I still haven't been able to properly say it.
I hope you know how much I loved you. Because I did you know.
Still do. Right now there is a gaping hole in my heart because of you being missing. I wish you could have stayed but I hope you're enjoying yourself at the rainbow bridge. Hopefully bossing your brother Ronnie around.
I still remember the day I got you. I had been so excited. Nic (My boyfriend/your dad) made me wait around all day because he was out of town and I just couldn't sit still. He didn't want me to spend ages in Pets At Home but I knew I probably would. But it didn't turn out that way. As soon as I saw you with your siblings I knew you were the one. I snapped you up before anyone else could and took you home. You were the best Christmas present ever.
I had a small cage for you all prepared for the first night and it was such a struggle getting you in the cage. You escaped out of the cardboard box just as we got into my bedroom. (Your first escape) and fell right off my desk. Luckily you were okay though I did cry thinking you would blame me for your fall and soon you settled down in your cage. You were so lovely.
You got a big tank after a few days but your living in that didn't last long because you kept managing to get the top open and getting out and jumping off my desk and underneath my bed. No matter how much weight I put on it or how much I sealed it you could still get it open. So I gave up and put you a new cage which you almost escaped out of. It was only a temporary cage until I got you a bigger one but you didn't seem to mind.
Taming was hard because at first you only wanted to do it on your own terms but soon you let me pick you up and cuddle you and you sat on my shoulder whilst I did my homework.
Urgh this is so hard. I loved you so much. I'm glad I got the chance to spoil you on your second birthday before you went. I've placed your body next to Ronnie's near the lavender plant and I'll get you a nice garden ornament to match Ronnie's too.
Run free and have fun my baby girl. You meant the world to me.
Goodbye. I'll see you again one day. <3
Goodbye my Rory. :( <3 Houdini Hamster
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