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Salem13 · 11-07-2021, 07:11 PM

There's no need to be embarrassed, this is a very common thing among pet lovers. Sometimes we can get in over our heads, animal care gets dumped on us, money gets tight, etc and we have to consider putting up pets for adoption. It's a really hard choice to make and we can often feel guilty for even considering it.

I want you to know that there is nothing wrong with looking for a new home for a pet. Whether its because of money, mental health, or being unable to provide what the pet needs for any reason. If you do decide to rehome her know that you did your best and that's all you can do.

As for the actual deciding on what to do- this can be difficult as it's generally a very personal matter. All I can offer is what I would do if I was in this situation and hope it can help you.

I think if you have not already discussed this with your partner that is probably a wise first step. This sounds to me that this is affecting how you feel in the relationship and that alone is grounds to have a talk- but also because rehoming someone else's pet without first talking about it is rarely going to go well. You'll probably want to bring up that you feel he should be doing more and that you are struggling. Talking about what to do with regards to the space is another good talking point. It sounds like free roaming isn't an option if she's attacked the cat and the apartment is small.

If it were my own pet and I was in your situation I would personally want to rehome her. I am of the opinion that if I am in an active state of stress over the care of a pet then I am not going to be the best owner I can be. Additionally constant stress is terrible for your own health in both the long and short term and I think it is a good idea to try and minimize it when possible.

There are a few options when it comes to rehoming. One is to try and find a nearby small animal or rabbit rescue. They will generally be knowledgeable about care and most will not adopt to people unless they prove they know what they are doing and have the required space available. However, sometimes these places are not local or are full and therefore not an option- here is where option two comes in. You could put up an ad on a classifieds site (or in a paper if you're old school). Just like the rescue would you can vet potential owners by asking them things like have you owned rabbits before, how much experience do you have, do you have any pictures of the space or enclosure the rabbit will be living in, etc. Some people may be irritated by all the questions but most will understand that you simply care for the animal and want the best for her. I myself have adopted animals from folks who have asked such things and find it reassuring that they believe me to be a suitable home. Some people even ask if they can receive updates on the pets as they settle in- don't be afraid to ask this yourself, it can definitely soothe some of the anxiety. In general in my own experience asking for a rehoming fee will help deter the people who will just spontaneously adopt a pet. I always asked for smaller fees as to avoid the situation of pricing many people out and even in one case fully waived the fee because I believed I had found the perfect home for my pet.

For context I have adopted out animals before, though not rabbits or even hamsters; horses. My mother and I had 7 horses we had had for nearly a decade. Eventually it became too expensive to continue caring for them and both of our chronic health issues and disabilities made it so we were not able to spend as much time with them as we previously had. It was a difficult thing to do but we chose to rehome them. That was about 7 years ago now and my mother has since passed and I no longer keep track of where they went. I know one of them became a therapy horse and another two of them went to a friend at the time who was training for the olympics. I still think of them and miss them but am happy to know they found homes that loved them as much as we did. I personally chose not to visit them or receive updates past the first few months as I found it hurt me to see them and I felt it was more productive to focus myself on the current pets than worry about the past ones.

I hope whatever you decide to do that it helps with the stress. I hope if you decide to rehome that it brings you peace in the end even if it hurts at first. Best of luck.

11-07-2021, 07:11 PM
Salem13 Hamster Pup Join Date: Dec 2019 Location: Canada Posts: 111	Re: Adoption thoughts There's no need to be embarrassed, this is a very common thing among pet lovers. Sometimes we can get in over our heads, animal care gets dumped on us, money gets tight, etc and we have to consider putting up pets for adoption. It's a really hard choice to make and we can often feel guilty for even considering it. I want you to know that there is nothing wrong with looking for a new home for a pet. Whether its because of money, mental health, or being unable to provide what the pet needs for any reason. If you do decide to rehome her know that you did your best and that's all you can do. As for the actual deciding on what to do- this can be difficult as it's generally a very personal matter. All I can offer is what I would do if I was in this situation and hope it can help you. I think if you have not already discussed this with your partner that is probably a wise first step. This sounds to me that this is affecting how you feel in the relationship and that alone is grounds to have a talk- but also because rehoming someone else's pet without first talking about it is rarely going to go well. You'll probably want to bring up that you feel he should be doing more and that you are struggling. Talking about what to do with regards to the space is another good talking point. It sounds like free roaming isn't an option if she's attacked the cat and the apartment is small. If it were my own pet and I was in your situation I would personally want to rehome her. I am of the opinion that if I am in an active state of stress over the care of a pet then I am not going to be the best owner I can be. Additionally constant stress is terrible for your own health in both the long and short term and I think it is a good idea to try and minimize it when possible. There are a few options when it comes to rehoming. One is to try and find a nearby small animal or rabbit rescue. They will generally be knowledgeable about care and most will not adopt to people unless they prove they know what they are doing and have the required space available. However, sometimes these places are not local or are full and therefore not an option- here is where option two comes in. You could put up an ad on a classifieds site (or in a paper if you're old school). Just like the rescue would you can vet potential owners by asking them things like have you owned rabbits before, how much experience do you have, do you have any pictures of the space or enclosure the rabbit will be living in, etc. Some people may be irritated by all the questions but most will understand that you simply care for the animal and want the best for her. I myself have adopted animals from folks who have asked such things and find it reassuring that they believe me to be a suitable home. Some people even ask if they can receive updates on the pets as they settle in- don't be afraid to ask this yourself, it can definitely soothe some of the anxiety. In general in my own experience asking for a rehoming fee will help deter the people who will just spontaneously adopt a pet. I always asked for smaller fees as to avoid the situation of pricing many people out and even in one case fully waived the fee because I believed I had found the perfect home for my pet. For context I have adopted out animals before, though not rabbits or even hamsters; horses. My mother and I had 7 horses we had had for nearly a decade. Eventually it became too expensive to continue caring for them and both of our chronic health issues and disabilities made it so we were not able to spend as much time with them as we previously had. It was a difficult thing to do but we chose to rehome them. That was about 7 years ago now and my mother has since passed and I no longer keep track of where they went. I know one of them became a therapy horse and another two of them went to a friend at the time who was training for the olympics. I still think of them and miss them but am happy to know they found homes that loved them as much as we did. I personally chose not to visit them or receive updates past the first few months as I found it hurt me to see them and I felt it was more productive to focus myself on the current pets than worry about the past ones. I hope whatever you decide to do that it helps with the stress. I hope if you decide to rehome that it brings you peace in the end even if it hurts at first. Best of luck.