Sadly Benji passed away last night. I found him curled up in his bed looking peaceful. I hope he went painlessly too.
I got him on the 29th October 2006, when he was 15 weeks old. From the moment I picked him I knew he was going to be a great little guy, he was up to mischeif trying to get to my chocolate fountain as he sat on my kitchen table in his travel case. He settled in quickly and well and loved his imac fantasy. He enjoyed making big mountains of carefresh for his bed and exploring. When he was out he'd explore my room, climb up my CD rack and onto my bedside table, through all my hamster things - stealing oats. He was always so tame and confident.
I'd do anything to see him run around my room without a care in the world, my hyper ball of fluff. To hold him that last time, to say good bye. The last thing I said to him was "Good night Benji, I love you." I never realised I'd never be able to speak to him again.
When I took him to the vet with the swollen stomach on the 28th of March 2007, I thought it was constipation. He had always been such a happy guy. When the vet said he had a tumour/cyst in his abdomen my whole world crashed around me. He predicted he'd have a few months to live.
To see him get bigger and slower was heart breaking. All he wanted to do was sleep, but when he was out he tried so hard to be the little energetic ball of fluff like he used to be. He grew skinnier but he still had a great appetite, the lump was taking all of his nutrition and energy.
I took out the tubes of his imac and I bought him a new cage, which he'll never get to enjoy.
Last night I had him out, he wasn't looking very good. He tried to climb onto a small shelf and fell back, so his little paws were in the air. He couldn't get up again. I had to turn him over. His bottom was covered in poo so I had to clean it up for him. It was an awful job but it was like he knew I was helping him. He put his head on my arm and let me clean his bum. I wrapped him in a towel to dry him off and he fell as sleep on me. We sat like that for 50 minutes as I watched him sleeping, too scared to move incase I disturbed him.
I guess the tumour was too much for him, he was a fighter but I guess his little body couldn't cope with it any longer.
Benji, I love you sooooo much and I hope you had a great life with me. I'd do anything to have you back. I hope you didn't suffer and I'm so glad I didn't have to put you to sleep. I'm glad you passed over whilst I was here, I don't know what I'd do if I wasn't here. Perhaps you knew. You were so young, only 8 months old. It hurts me that you'd never celebrate your birthday. You didn't deserve to die so young or go through what you did whilst having the tumour.
I'm burying him later, I can't face it right now. He looks so peaceful, snuggled up in his bed.
R.I.P Little guy, I love you!!! xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Benji - Mid-July 2006 - 8th April 2007, gone but never, ever forgotten! You'll always have a special place in my heart xxxxxxxxxx
My gorgeous little guy, you meant a lot to me.
Some of my favourite photos:
My favourite video ever:
I'd like to thank babyboos for him, he was a great little guy and has given me lots of happy memories.