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Old 06-14-2020, 07:02 PM   #1
Presley524
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Join Date: Apr 2020
Location: Maine
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Default How To Nicely Tell someone They aren't Taking Good Care of Their Hamster?

So, I have this friend of mine who went out to get a hamster when I talked about getting a new one. She was telling me about all this "Research" she did for him, and most of it is wrong... She told me that she keeps her little Robo in a 20g high fish tank (dimensions are 24 in by 12 in) with less than an inch of bedding. She also lets him use a exercise ball. Which every time I've seen him in it he seems super stressed out. When I go to visit my friend, her hamster is trying his hardest to dig in the bedding and tries to climb up his toys to escape. I tried to tell her subtly how to take care of them by talking about my hamster set up for my hamsters. Like, how much bedding and cage size (I know cage size is mostly opinion, but I feel like 20g is wayyy to small no matter how you look at it especially with her hammy trying to escape.) When I told her what I do though, she said I was over spoiling my hamsters. Anyone else have an idea to tell her? I don't want to make her feel bad because she genuinely loves her hamster just read the wrong information about them...
Any advice on bringing this up to her would be greatly appreciated!
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Old 06-14-2020, 09:05 PM   #2
RoboLvr
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Thumbs up Re: How To Nicely Tell someone They aren't Taking Good Care of Their Hamster?

I would suggest maybe subtlety sending her YouTube videos of proper hamster care?? In a way that doesn’t make it seem like you’re calling her out, just recommending a video you liked. Victoria Rachel has some great videos about beginner hamster care if you’re not sure where to look. Good luck!! I hope she realizes her mistakes
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Old 06-14-2020, 11:51 PM   #3
Ria P
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Default Re: How To Nicely Tell someone They aren't Taking Good Care of Their Hamster?

This must be so difficult for you to see that poor little hamster in distress.
You've tried the nice way but if your friend continues to refuse to listen, i'd say that a more direct approach is required.
Just as well she's not my friend because we would have fallen out with me telling her exactly what i thought about her treating her hamster so badly.
The lack of substrate and use of a hamsterball worries me more than the size of the cage. The hamster could get ill due to stress, something so easily avoided by adding enough substrate to burrow. You could suggest a playpen and then to use the ball as a means of transport to get in and out of the cage.
I wouldn't worry about making her feel bad and i don't understand why she ignores her hamsters distress if she cares about him.
Maybe you could suggest for her to join this forum so she can read the correct information.
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Old 06-15-2020, 12:25 AM   #4
Ithuviel
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Default Re: How To Nicely Tell someone They aren't Taking Good Care of Their Hamster?

Sometimes is very hard to tell someone that they are mistreating their pet especially if its a friend. I'm a part of a hamster owners community in my country and we deal with mistreatment daily.

The excuses ususally are: Pet shop person told them it is ok, vet told them it is ok. Hamsters are small so this 20 cm by 30 cm cage is fine. etc. These type of people will not change their behavior and will not improve.

Some do change and they get a bin and a wheel and start again but these are rare cases.

You could give her some youtube videos like: erinsanimals and Munchiesplace. Just say that you are inspired by these people and make sure you give the videos that talk about basic care.
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Old 06-15-2020, 10:53 AM   #5
Presley524
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Default Re: How To Nicely Tell someone They aren't Taking Good Care of Their Hamster?

Thank you both. It is a great idea to link her to some Youtubers. I'll try that.

Ria, I don't think she purposely ignoring his distress, but he's her first hamster so I think she just assumes it is normal behavior he's showing. I'm going to try the youtubers and hopefully she'll listen to them better!
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Old 06-16-2020, 02:06 AM   #6
velma
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Default Re: How To Nicely Tell someone They aren't Taking Good Care of Their Hamster?

I think people can get defensive & then more cling on to the idea that what they're doing is fine if you're too direct as people do get their backs up when they feel attacked. I think the idea of approaching this by sending things like YouTube videos is a good idea. A "this is such a cool toy/set up/idea. I might see if I can make it work in my cage/that hamster looks like he's having a lot of fun" type messages might encourage your friend to want to watch the videos and hopefully she can make some adjustments.
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Old 06-16-2020, 09:31 AM   #7
TinyBubbles
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Default Re: How To Nicely Tell someone They aren't Taking Good Care of Their Hamster?

I was also going to suggest Victoria Rachel as she seems to be the most strict.

I ran across her when I was doing my research but unfortunately with super outdated and wrong info on the web I thought she was the exception and called her a "crazy hamster lady"... Fast forward 5 months later and now I call her "guru".

My youngest is asking for a hamster to live in his room and I told him we would discuss it after he watched her 52 video series on care/tips.
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Old 06-16-2020, 08:16 PM   #8
Presley524
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Default

I love Victoria Rachel! I thought the same thing when I first watched her as well. She’s definitely opened my eyes to how some advice on the internet is awful.

Thanks, Velma. I’m saving a couple links to some of my favorite hamster Youtubers to send to her subtly

Last edited by souffle; 06-16-2020 at 11:44 PM.
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