Managing OCD when you have hamsters

[Chiela]

To those that don't already know, I am the mother of Emma H_amster.
Emma is 14 and just got diagnosed? with OCD (I am writing this with Emmas permission of course ^^).

Right now it is really bad for Emma, she has problems with germs. She has a big fear of getting sick, and maybe even die. (this because she has seen me being really sick and almost die ). But to make a long story short, almost everything is a risk in Emmas head and she washes her hands very often.

I was wondering.... I have noticed that some people in here have OCD and maybe they understand what is going on in Emmas head better that I.
How do you handle your hamsters?

Emma can't (not wont but can't) put her hands in Poro's cage, because there might be germs, that potentially could make her sick. Because of this I take most care of Poro at the moment, but this is making Emma really sad, as she want's to take care of her and cuddle her. I stand for giving Poro food and fresh water. And most of the time also talking to her.
On a good day Emma can stroke Poro, and even hold her (although this is seldom).

Are there any advise you could give that might help Emma?
Maybe something that helps you?
As it really hurts me to see her struggle with this, it's really clear that she want to do all of this. Poro is Emmas hamster, and she loves her.
Maybe I should mention, that Emma talks to Poro in a distance every day. But she is sad she can't make herself do more.

Thank you in advance, for anyone who might be able to tell something, that might help her.

[Gemma_xo]

Hi to you and Emma, and of course Poro.

Does Poro have a play pen that Emma could potentially start with, with Poro?
I mean it's not the cage, it'll just be a play pen, Emma could just sit there and talk to Poro so they get used to each other and slowly stroke, put her hand into the play pen, have Poro walk / or even sit on her hand etc, give treats (small ones like sunflower seeds) from the play pen?

The above is small steps to getting them both to bond and also getting Emma to interact with Poro without the stress of whats going on in the cage.
x

[Chiela]

Thank you Gemma.
That is actually a good idea (DOOH why didn't I think of that ).

I have just started another thread, about the playpen.
But the way you say maybe I can "fix" two problems, in one go (do you even say it like that? LOL).
Emma already has a good bond with Poro, this is also why it hurts her, that she can't take proper care of her, and need my help (which I gladly do, Poro is a real darling).
But just maybe if I take Poro out, Emma can convince herself to touch her in the playpen, this will also calm Poro a little I think.

[Fluffagrams]

I'm afraid I don't know a great deal about OCD but I understand a great deal about hypersensitivities to touch due to my own condition and I wonder if gloves would help?

When I was a teenager and at my most difficult phase of this condition, I'd have days when I couldn't bear to touch certain textures and cleaning my hamsters out would have been a nightmare so I used to wear thin cotton gloves underneath washing up gloves to clean the cage and fleece gloves to handle my hamster. I'll still use gloves if I'm having a bad day and think that May's whiskers twitching or feeling her claws will bother me.

[charcobain]

Does your daughter have someone she speaks to now shes been diagnosed with OCD? A therapist/counsellor at all? If so, maybe go into one of her sessions with her (of course only if she would like you too) and mention the hamster situation, they may be able to talk to her and help with the situation.

[Thin Lizzy]

Hi there and Emma, I suffered badly from OCD years back and it was the same as Emma's, I constantly washed/scrubbed my hands and it at times till they bled.
It all happened because I found dog hairs in my meals. I was a teenager at the time and wouldn't touch the dog in fear of germs and I refused to eat anything my mum made because of the hairs. I got to a point where I'd wait till they'd got their dinner and then I'd clean everything before using it or cooking.
Back then (over 20 years ago), there wasn't much understanding so I didn't get support from the family and I was a freak to them.
Emma's so lucky that you understand and want to do anything to help her.
Gemma made a good point about the Play pen. Getting Emma to sit and talk to Poro for starters.
Then maybe ask Emma to give Poro a treat, have a pack of antibacterial wipes nearby so she can wipe her hands. Gradually ask Emma to stroke Poro and increase the stroking.
As the contact increases, hold back on the hand wipes or hand washing, telling her that she's doing great.
When you reach the point of Emma holding Poro, just do the same. Maybe getting Emma to do some breathing exercises before contact with Poro.
Have you thought of CBT? Cognitive Behaviour Therapy! You would need to get Emma referred by her GP but, this is where the therapist suggests ways of dealing with her phobia, ways to prepare before and after.

[virtualkeith]

Hi Chiela,
I'll say right off that I don't have personal experience with OCD, but is Emma aware that there is something called beneficial bacteria? Medicine has discovered that when a person takes antibiotics for instance, that person should have yogurt afterwards as well as pro-biotics to replenish the GI tract in order to rebalance the colon. Maybe if you haven't already, try to explain to her that we need good bacteria as well which helps us stay healthy. Our bodies have a built in defense system against illness.
Also, let her know, that it is in fact a good idea to wash your hands before and after playing with a hamster, so you can let her know that good hygiene is important within reason.
Sorry if you've tried this already, but it's just something I thought of.

[hammy2]

I kind of know where she's coming from as I can handle any animal, insect and grub. I don't even mind them having accidents on my hands BUT if there's an animal thats dead I have a phobia about touching it even if the body is fresh. There's no rational reason for the phobia because I know if I wash my hands after the germs would be gone. It's just touching a lifeless body I don't like. With phobias you have to do the thing you hate the most to overcome them. Eg my mum was terrified of spiders but I would stay calm and cup them but show her the spider at a safe distance and now she likes spiders

[Donkey]

Managing OCD is, I'm afraid, going to take more than introducing things slowly or giving rational explanations. OCD is not a phobia, it is so much more than that. If a sufferer does not perform the compulsion then the feelings caused can be completely overwhelming and lead to depression, anxiety and panic attacks. OCD such as this, with a diagnosis, is so much more than just being worried about "germs". I do not suffer myself, lucky for me, however both my husband and stepdaughter do, to differing degrees.

As Emma has a diagnosis I would definitely push for her to be referred for Cognitive Behaviour Therapy (CBT). This is ultimately something that everyone close to Emma would need to be involved in, as one of they keys is not to facilitate the obsessions / compulsions whilst remaining understanding of what she is going through. I don't know how old Emma is, but this would need to include not only family, but trusted friends and boyfriend where relevant.

I don't know what the health service in Denmark is like, and how it works, but I really hope that CBT is available to you there, and would certainly strongly recommend trying it before resorting to medication, which, although it can be effective, has so many side effects and risks, that if there is an alternative, then please try it first.

OCD is unfortunately not something that just goes away or that you get over, however, with the right support Emma will learn to manage it.

Emma - love and light to you, you CAN manage this horrible thing, it will not control you and will not rule your life. My stepdaughter was diagnosed at 9 years old, and is now 30 with a family of her own and a successful career. She has had to work hard to manage her obsessions, and they still get the better of her from time to time, but she will always beat them in the end.

[Coco61]

Chilean, Donkey is right. CBT is the best path forward for Emma. The earlier it starts the better. Of course finding the right therapist is not always easy. There is good information on the internet about CBT.
I can recommend a book available from Amazon to help. It's called Overcoming OCD by David Veale and Rob Wilson. I know it is in English but the authors are a psychiatrist and therapist in this field. It should help you both.