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Old 03-15-2020, 07:35 AM   #1
Wembley
Newborn Pup
 
Join Date: Jul 2019
Posts: 16
Unhappy Wembley has passed on.

I feel absolutely rotten. It’s the classic case of feeling guilty for your pets death, and the “what if”s of it all.
Wembley was a bit over two years old, and lately I’ve felt a weird energy about him. I knew he was perfectly healthy and active and healthy, but in his age I felt as though every moment is precious?
Last night, I gave him some scrambled egg which he pouched, and thought I should take him out for a while since it’s a weekend and I can’t always get him out as long as I’d like on weekdays. I took him out and he was running around as usual, climbing on his carrier up to where the food bags are on top of it, as usual, and even managed to climb inside a bag and eat some before I took him out . When I take him out to free roam, i sit on the floor back on to my couch, and he’ll climb onto my lap and up over my shoulder onto the seat of the couch and back down again and so on. Sometimes he climbs onto the arms of the couch, but usually comes back down again and never jumps. He was such a climber, constantly climbing onto the backs of things and so on. I was back on to him, on Etsy looking at toys for him, as lately I’ve been considering getting a rescue mouse, which my brain made me feel guilty for like i was “replacing” Wembley. As I was looking at toys for him, he climbed onto the arm behind me, and I wish more than anything I had turned around and took him down and he’d be sleeping soundly now. Or that I hadn’t taken him out at all, or that I’d went out for the night instead. I heard a thud and immediately knew he had fell, but he’s had other cases like this one, when I first got him I had a bin cage for him and he somehow escaped from the cage on a desk to behind my book shelf, meaning a high jump.
Anyway, I turned around to soothe him and he was flat on the ground on his side and limp when picked him up. Immediately I felt chilled and awful, he started gasping for air and his head started twitching, i tried to offer a bottle in my panic and google for help while petting him, but eventually he stopped breathing. I feel awful since if I had only not taken him out, or caught him he could have lived for months more. I know it’s wrong to think this way since he could have gotten sick in a month, no one knows, but it was so preventable. I feel awful since he trusted me and he was probably so confused. This is my first hamster ever and I know he had a good life as he free roamed, had a 702 sq inch cage and I had taken him to the vets before. I feel so guilty whenever I see photos of him and I don’t know how I’ll ever get another pet without feeling morbid as I blame myself for Wembleys death. Nothing feels real.
I’m scared posting this that someone will confirm my belief that it’s my fault, but I need to get it out of my mind. Accidents happen and he had a good life. I’m guessing to die so fast he must have done something to his back or neck.
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Old 03-15-2020, 08:26 AM   #2
LunaTheHamster1
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Posts: 2,593
Default Re: Wembley has passed on.

I am so sorry to hear this. I can only imagine what you are going through. VIctoria Raechel off YouTube has some good words about when things go wrong or we havnt always given our hamsters/pets the care they need. It's what we learn from that experience and that we change things that is just as important. (She words it better than me) I am absolutley 100% sure you meant no harm to Wembley and accidents do happen. For example my dad was playing with our dog once and it ran around making circles , the circles got too big, the dog ran off the grass into the road and a car just happened to be going by at the wrong time. I guess you can imagine what happened. I know my dad learnt from that experience. Horrific experience to learn,but a lesson learnt none the less. I'm not sure if I am making matters worse here or helping. I hope i am not upsetting you even more, not my intentiom at all. Maybe when the time is right, you can ask yourself what you would do differently in future and just try not to do it again. I really do feel for you, I think you have been incredibly brave coming to the forum and sharing this experience.
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Old 03-15-2020, 10:04 AM   #3
Vierville
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Default Re: Wembley has passed on.

I'm so sorry for your loss Wembley. While it was tragic, it was an accident. Accidents by their very definition are unforeseen. You took him out with the best of intentions and that is all that you should focus on. What happened cannot be changed. You are going through the worst nightmare for most pet owners and my thoughts go out to you in this horrible time.
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Old 03-15-2020, 11:36 AM   #4
Ria P
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Join Date: Mar 2019
Location: Wiltshire, UK
Posts: 7,103
Default Re: Wembley has passed on.

You must be absolutely devasted by the unfortunate circumstances of your hamster's passing. It will take a while for you to come to terms with it and nothing anybody can say to you will make you feel less guilty.

Remember that it could have happened to any of us, no matter how well we care for our hamsters, accidents do happen.

My hamster Edwina climbs up my arm to the top of the futon and has never attempted to jump but she could lose her footing and slip which is what probably happened to Wembley. My hamster Henry has jumped off my arm and luckily i managed to catch him mid air, just.

You need time to grieve and think of the good life Wembley had with you and in time you will be ready to offer another hamster a loving and caring home.
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Old 03-15-2020, 12:26 PM   #5
VOESSY
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Default Re: Wembley has passed on.

I'm so sorry to read this.
It was an accident and you should not wear that on your shoulders as guilt beyond what comes with the pain. Surely Wembley knew you loved him immensely and I'm sure you had a great two years together.

I hope you find some peace with time and strength in your heart to care for other animals in the future. They are what make things brighter in life. Best wishes x
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Old 03-15-2020, 12:38 PM   #6
Wembley
Newborn Pup
 
Join Date: Jul 2019
Posts: 16
Default Re: Wembley has passed on.

Thank you so much for the kind messages. It was an accident but it feels so hard to come to terms with the what ifs, it means so much to hear others thoughts. <3 I’ve kept the seeds from his last horde for myself and am planning to do up a keepsake box and a photo album for him, I’ll be burying him with some things he liked in life, as well as a photo of him and some crystals for well wishes.
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Old 05-12-2020, 08:43 AM   #7
souffle
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Default Re: Wembley has passed on.

I'm so sorry for your loss. Accidents do happen and we have all done things we regret. He is running free at the bridge now x
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