Syringe feeding?

[AprilPearl]

Thank you Serendipity and Vierville for your kind words and advice. I have decided definitely not to syringe feed as I think it would just upset him.

I think you’re both right - he is dying

I don’t want him to suffer and I do plan on definitely helping him along when the time comes... But I don’t think I will take him to the vet until he’s stopped eating because while he is eating I feel as though he still has a will to live.

I don’t think it will be long, though. He seems to be either unable or unwilling to walk now and is spending all his time in his nest sleeping. I don’t think he is drinking as the water level doesn’t go down and if he can’t walk or raise his head he can’t get to the bottle any way.

However, he is still eating very small quantities of baby food and crushed up Harry Hamster mixed with water. Today he also had some cucumber which I gave him to try and get some water into him (he wouldn’t drink from the bottle when I offered it to him).

He does take a very long time to eat, which was why I had considered syringe feeding. He gets very tired when eating and keeps having to stop and rest and it takes him a long time to chew and swallow.

I’m spoon feeding him for about an hour in the morning and an hour in the evening but he is getting down less than half a teaspoon of food after an hour of feeding. I wish I had more time to be feeding him in.

When he stops eating altogether I do realise that it’ll be time for him to go. I don’t want to be selfish.

I hate to see him like this. It breaks my heart.

[Vierville]

It breaks my heart to hear what you and Quigley are going through.

You really are doing everything you possibly can for him.
Hamsters are such pure little souls and it is just awful that they have to leave us...

[souffle]

It's a very hard time for you. If he's not getting up though be careful that he is not soiling himself underneath as this can make them very sore so sometime you do have to move them to check this. If he is all wet and messy it would say to me that it is time as you know he can't manage. As I said before a few days early is better than one hour of suffering. I have waited before being sure they will make their own way there and wished I had not when I have checked them underneath.
I hope he chooses his path soon and am thinking of you both x

[AprilPearl]

Thank you Vierville and Souffle.

I think it might be time for him to go now actually. He’s deteriorated fast over the past 48 hours. This morning when I tried to spoon feed him he just lay on my hand all limp. He’s not well at all and I don’t want him to suffer. I said when he stopped eating I would take him and now he has stopped eating I think he wants to go.

I still worry that this isn’t the right choice but I do believe he isn’t long for this world regardless. He isn’t eating or drinking, he’s very underweight, he can’t walk, he doesn’t groom himself... He can’t be happy. I think letting nature take its course would just prolong his suffering. Am I wrong?

[souffle]

It is the right choice and you have to power to give him a peaceful route to the bridge with no lingering in pain. Tread lightly little one x

[Vierville]

It would be the kind thing to do to help him on his way as heartbreaking as it is. Bless his little soul.

[Pebbles82]

I am so sorry April. I think I understand how incredibly hard this is for you as I had it with Charlie, and although we all want them to go peacefully at home, sometimes it isn't that simple. I think when you said he was refusing water, that says to me he is telling you he is ready to go. I completely understand about nature taking its course because it seems more natural and I used to feel like that. It sounds like you've been having him out of the cage for the feeding - I was doing that with Charlie too and I think it was helping him hang on more. I was also sitting up at night with him laid on me. I just found it hard leaving him alone in his nest to die when it seemed to be taking so long. And then he would rally round a bit again and not go. He was unconscious eventually but still didn't die.

I know that awful feeling about "is it the right choice". Whatever anybody said I found this choice incredibly hard the first time. But now I don't. They need our help when they are suffering. We can't give them intravenous morphine as you would with a human, to keep them pain free and effectively speed up the process. The only option we have is for them to sleep under gas anaesthetic which is a nice sleep and they don't feel any pain, and they sometimes pass naturally during that sleep but the vet will also give the injection while they are asleep and pain free.

It is so hard for you. And they do seem to try to keep going right until the end. He does sound very much like he is ready to go now. No-one can say to you when is the right time. I think it is a very hard thing for us to feel we are playing God or something, but I have rationalised this now - because of the lack of pain relief available for these little pets - we have to work with what is available and passing under anaesthesia is a peaceful way. So don't worry about that if you think it is the right time. It is literally just helping them on their way.

All I can say is no decision is the wrong decision now. Because your decision is made out of love. If you decide to give him a bit longer and see if he passes in his nest that may be because you feel he is near the end. Maybe you could make a vet appointment for this evening as that gives a bit longer to see if nature now takes its course and if it doesn't then he can be helped on his way. You could ring the vet first and see if that is possible. I always check they do gas anaesthesia first anyway. My current vet will only do it that way. Not all vets do.

If you do take him you could scoop his nest into a favourite little house or hide or something so he is all cosy and he can stay in that when he goes to sleep.

But please don't feel pressured or guilty about any decision you make. It is such a difficult time. Quigley will love and trust you whatever you decide to do.

I like to think of it that they have said their goodbye to us when they start refusing food and water - it is a sign that they want to be on their own now.

[Pebbles82]

"I still worry that this isn’t the right choice but I do believe he isn’t long for this world regardless."

This is why you don't need to worry about any choice you make - because nothing will be the wrong choice, because he isn't long for this world xxxxx

If you decide to wait it is ok. If you decide that you don't want to wait in case he suffers more, that is ok too. The hardest bit is the uncertainty as to how long to wait. And sometimes that in itself can help you decide not to wait. My thoughts are with you xxx

Every situation is different. With Newt, he was in pain and I could tell and I decided not to wait also because he was swollen and I feared he would burst and have an awful death. So that decision was much easier.

All I can say is - he won't know much about anything now and so helping him on his way will not be any distress to him. The hard bit is for us - handing them over. Because you can't go in the room where the gas anaesthetic is. But I think that is ok - they came to us from somewhere else after being born and we are handing them into peace.

[Vierville]

Serendipity, that was the most touching and kind and sensible piece on this awful subject that I have ever read. I hope it helps AprilPearl and I know that it will help many others who read it who are in this situation in time to come.

[AprilPearl]

Thank you so much Serendipity, that helped such a lot. And thank you Souffle and Vierville too. Your advice and kind words has been much appreciated.

Quigley is gone now. We took him to the vets and they put him to sleep. I think it was the right choice because he did look to be suffering and I’d say he had only hours left anyway - days at the most.

The only thing I wasn’t prepared for was that I wasn’t allowed to be with him while he died. They had to gas him before the injection and apparently I couldn’t be in the room with the gas.

He was the most friendly and chilled out hamster I’ve ever had. I can’t believe he’s gone. I’ll miss him so much.