RIP Max

[BorisPasha]

The last thing I expected today was to find myself starting a thread in the memorial section but here I am.

At around 5.30pm tonight I noticed Max was out and about which is unusual for him as he's a late riser. I didn't think too much about it though and thought he was up for a drink with the weather being so warm. He didn't have a drink though and was going back and forth between his nest and his water or lying in his tunnel making a clicking noise. He hadn't eaten much of his food either but again I put it down to the hot weather. Max was a burrower and he spent most of his time under the ground and wasn't really interested in interacting much with us but when he did he was always so very sweet and lovely.

I found it strange that he was lying in his tunnel and letting me stroke him without voicing his annoyance at me, Ham-Dad was home 5 minutes later and we got an emergency appointment at the vet as he really did not seem himself.

Just over an hour later we were at the vets, I was really worried by then as he was just sitting on top of the bedding rocking back and forth, he didn't even put up any resistance when I lifted him out. The vet said it definitely seemed like there was a problem with his respiritory system and he said the prognosis didn't look good but thought he had a chance of making it with the antiobiotics and anti-inflammatorys as he looked in good condition and wasn't skinny. By the time he came back with the medicine Maxi had deteriorated further and was struggling to breath. The vet felt that he was suffering and might not make it home and the kindest thing to do would be to have him pts as he was going downhill so quickly.

We said our goodbyes, Max was just sitting cuddling in to my arm the whole time and when I went to hand him to the vet he tried to climb back on to my hand like he didn't want to go. It completely broke my heart and it's going to haunt me for a very long time. I feel so guilty even though I'm sure it was the right thing to do but I'm so upset, my head hurts, I feel sick and my chest aches from crying and trying to stop crying.

I can't believe he's gone, we brought him home on the 4th March and he's gone so soon. He is our first hamster (first pet as well) to go to the rainbow bridge and I miss him so much it hurts.

RIP Max and have fun at the bridge, we miss you terribly and we will love you forever xx

This was from the day we brought him home.
http://i36.photobucket.com/albums/e27/wehave3hamsterS/Maxim/e2de47ad-ec45-4f53-862b-fea79c2900fe_zpsavn8htrh.jpg (http://s36.photobucket.com/user/wehave3hamsterS/media/Maxim/e2de47ad-ec45-4f53-862b-fea79c2900fe_zpsavn8htrh.jpg.html)

[AprilPearl]

I am so sorry to hear this. When I saw the title of this thread my first thought was: "Not BP's Max, surely?". If I am shocked, I can only imagine how you must be feeling right now. Just please don't feel guilty. Max clearly loved you, right up to the end of his life, and you did right by him. Ending his suffering was the kindest thing to do. I know how horrible it is to lose a pet, especially so soon, but please know that you did everything you could for him. Thinking of you and sending hugs. Run free, little handsome Max xx

[BethandLil]

So sorry to hear of Max's sudden passing. Thinking of you, BP.

[Fluffagrams]

I'm sorry to hear this BP.

Run free Max.

[CMB]

Such sad news. Best wishes to you BP. Run free at the rainbow bridge Max.

[Crystalroborovski]

Oh BP, I am so incredibly sorry to hear that little Max left you.

Please don't feel guilty about getting him pts. It's the last kindness you could do to him in his suffering. I know you loved him very much and I understand the hurt of having to help a pet over the rainbow bridge. It's a hard decision but take comfort in knowing that he didn't have to endure the pain of fighting off his illness for very long.

Have fun at the bridge little Max xxx

[dreamtree1234]

Oh no, BP! I can't believe that this is happened to you and your sweetie! When I read this, I burst into tears for you, your husband, and your beloved Max. I am still crying as I am writing this. I am so, so, SO VERY sorry that he has passed over to the Rainbow Bridge. I know how dearly you loved and cherished him. He was truly an amazing and cute little guy, and he has definitely left a significant pawprint in the hearts of all of us at HC. I know that it must have been one of the absolute hardest and most heartbreaking things that you had to do, but you did it out of such love and concern for him so please, PLEASE don't blame yourself. He was a brave hammy and had lived his short but happy life to the fullest. He didn't let being three-legged hinder him from making the most of every minute due to your love and encouragement and, in the end, he needed your help once again and you were right there with him as always until the very end. You are truly an amazing and devoted hammy mum to all of your precious furballs, and I know that Max realized that you were only doing the most loving and selfless thing that you could possibly do in order to ease and end all of his pain. You took in this little guy and gave him the most amazing and loving home he could possibly dream of. I am certain that he couldn't be any happier to have you as his mum until the end. My heart break for all of you, and I so wish that I could help to ease your pain. If you ever need anything at all, please know that I am here for you and that you are in my thoughts and prayers. Please try to remember only the happy times that you shared with darling Max because he would want to wipe away all of your tears with many whisker kisses. He would want for you to be happy and alright. Rest in peace, darling Max. May you run free over the Rainbow Bridge and make many marvelous and intricate tunnels there, too. Sweet Max, please find a way to send a lovely sign to your devoted mum so she will know that you have found peace and are no longer in any pain. Although you are too quickly gone, you will never, ever be forgotten because you are loved by us all. BP, I am sending you tons of hugs and Eros is sending many, many whisker kisses your way, too. Take care and know that I and the rest of HC are here for you during this terrible time of grief and sorrow. Hugs! :(

[Drago]

BP, I'm so so sorry :( I was shocked to read this, I actually gasped when I realized who it was. It must be very difficult to have lost him, but I assure you that you've made the right decision. What you did, whether it seems right now or not, was the kindest decision you could make. It was very selfless of you to let him go, and now he is no longer suffering. You gave little Max an amazing home, and I'm sure he truly loved you two, despite being a little tunneler. It's going to hurt for a while, do take your time to heal and acknowledge your feelings, but try to take some time to calm yourself as well, and remember that what you did was for the best. Goodbye Max you little sweetheart, make lots of tunnels at the bridge X

https://www.rainbowsbridge.com/Grief_Support_Center/Grief_Support_Home.htm
This site has really always been of help to me in coping xx

[SKB_Hamsters]

I am so sorry to hear this BorisPasha. I was in shock and deeply saddened when I saw this thread. My condolences are with you during this difficult time. You gave Max a wonderful life with endless amounts of love!

Run free Max and play well at the bridge.

[chesca_27]

BP I'm so sorry for your loss. I was absolutely shocked to read the thread title and I can't imagine how you must be feeling right now. Please don't blame yourself as you did everything you could to help him and what you did was in his best interest. Max was a very well looked after and greatly loved little hamster. Take comfort in the fact that you gave him a wonderful life and he was so incredibly lucky to end up with you as an owner.

Max - RIP and play well at The Rainbow Bridge

[FelicityAnn]

So, so sorry to hear of Max's passing. He's free of any pain now, and you have your memories...

[cypher]

BP I am so very sorry, I was so shocked to see this & can only imagine how shocked & devastated you must be to lose little Maxi so suddenly.
His life with you was far to short but you made it the best life he could have wanted & his life with you was happy & so full of love, I know it's hard not to feel guilt when having to make this difficult decision but you did the best for him & it was a gift of love, take comfort knowing he didn't suffer for long & is at peace now.
Huge hugs to you & hamdad.

Run free & play well at the bridge little Maxi.

[Pebbles82]

I am so sorry Boris Pasha xxxx It is so hard to let them go, even when it is done with love and kindness. It is heart-wrenching. But he is free from suffering now. xxx Try to remember the lovely moments with you. He didn't know he was going to be pts - he probably crawled on your hand because it was more familiar than the vet's hand. Big hugs - I also found it so hard and Charlie was unconscious at the time.

[souffle]

I am so very sorry Boris Pasha. What a special little man Max was and what an inspriration to us too. Try and think of it as him coming back to say thank you for letting me fly free and be at peace now I have been called.
He was much loved and will be much missed
Run free at the bridge Max lad xx

[Burakki]

RIP little Max! I hope sun will be warm and clouds will be soft for you up there. Be free and comfy at the bridge! You will be missed!

[Coco61]

So very sorry to read this BP. Like others I was shocked it was your Max. Others have written very eloquently about the hard decision you made being the kindest one of all. Be comforted by that love Max had for you and Ham dad and you both for him.
Run free little Max. Play well at the bridge now.

[Thin Lizzy]

BP, I hadn't been on HC for a couple of days and couldn't believe my eyes when I saw your thread and I'm so shocked, my heart goes out to you. You made the right decision, Max is at peace. I know you only had him a short while but, the love you gave him was huge and he stole my heart with his cuteness & cheekiness.
Thinking of you xxxx

[BorisPasha]

Although I haven't been on for a few days I just wanted to let you all know that we have read all your messages from afar at least once and I'm sorry I haven't been able to log in and thank you all until now. The support you have all shown has meant so much to us and we have been touched by the kindness you have shown.

It's been hard and I still can't believe he's gone although I have at least managed to not start crying everytime I think about him. Sometimes the tears just catch me unaware like when I go to say night night to the rest of the boys and the space where his cage used to be takes me by surprise or when I see his little special bowl. We haven't been able to clean out his cage yet either. It is sitting in the dining room for now but it's hard to walk in and see it as it just reminds me all over again. I'm glad I have the other 4 boys to keep me busy though I feel guilty if one of them does something funny and I laugh. Artie has taken to making little whimpering sounds in his sleep which he hasn't really done since Max became his neighbour, so I guess they must sense that something is different. Perhaps my tough little Artie isn't as tough as he makes out. Even Jaska has been out the last couple of nights before we went to bed.

He is going to be cremated, there is too many cats here so we didn't feel comfortable burying him. It was a communal one - we were too upset and shocked when we were at the vets to think clearly but the next day it was just weighing on us. Luckily we were able to change it to a single cremation so we will get his ashes back and be able to find a memorial for him when we can face it so that has made us feel a bit better.

Even just writing this is making me teary but it feels cathartic to be able to put it down in writing rather than bottling it up.

Anyway thank you all again so much, you've no idea how much your support has meant to us and thank you for letting me ramble on again xx

[Thin Lizzy]

Reading your post brought tears to my eyes, the great thing about HC is the support & understanding and knowing you're not alone.
I'm glad you and your other half are taking comfort in your boys, bless them, they do sense when another is gone and sense you're upset.
Big Hugs to you and your hamily xxxx

[Hamsterita]

I've already said to you all I could tell you, but anyway I wanted to leave my print here, to commemorate the life of our little furry friend. Rest in peace wherever you are Max, and play well at the rainbow bridge.

[dreamtree1234]

Oh, BP, reading your post made me teary-eyed. I am so, so sorry. Expect yourself to have those gushing feeling of deep emotions; they will come and go like the tide, and that is perfectly natural and expected. Give yourself plenty of time to heal your heart, and please know that we are all here for you, your husband, and your hammies. It is so heartbreaking that poor Artie has gone to whimpering now, but he probably senses that Max is missing from your loving home. Please give him an extra cuddles from me. Jaska and the rest of your hamily are all probably trying to find a way to be there extra to comfort you since they can feel the sadness in your heart. How sweet they all are for being there for their Mum and Hamdad. Give them all extra cuddles from me, too.

BP, never feel like you are rambling; you are just sharing your feeling instead of bottling them up for later. We all want to be there for you how ever we can, and talking to those who care for you is part of a healthy, healing process. We are your friends, and we truly, TRULY care so please let us comfort you in your time of sorrow. We are here for you through the good times and the bad. So share all that you want, and know that you have friends in us. Big hugs to you, your husband, and your whole hammy family.

[BorisPasha]

Wanted to leave Max's urn here too.

44513

[cypher]

That's lovely for him BP.

[BluerayDarkes]

So sorry to hear about Max, play well at the bridge little one

[Coco61]

Simple and beautiful.

[Thin Lizzy]

Agree with Coco, so brought a tear to my eyes.