My Poor Little Man :'(

[crazyc4tlady]

I am absolutely distraught. I cannot stop crying.
I came home from work this morning to find my little Boris had passed and I found him in a way that I wish no hamster owner to ever find their little ones.
I think one of my evil cats must have somehow got to him and I completely blame myself for it.
I have no idea what happened and I don't even know what to do with myself right now, I'm so sorry Boris it was my fault :(

[BluerayDarkes]

*hugs tight*

[Willow Wisp]

I am so sorry for your loss.
Play well at the bridge little Boris x

[crazyc4tlady]

I feel so ashamed :( I don't even know how they got to him his cage was completely secure and closed!
I must look so silly literally crying my eyes out over a hamster but I loved him so much!
No more hamsters for me.

[racinghamster]

Sadly, cats are more determined than we give them credit for and I`m really sorry you had to find Boris like this. Keeping cats out of the room is a must when keeping rodents because cats are killers. No other way of puting it. How did they manage to get into the cage? Really sorry for you. Try and keep your chin up. x

[crazyc4tlady]

I have no idea how they got him at all. My cats have been so bored by the hamsters they would ignore them, and this is why I know it's my fault because I left the cats in the room with them. I don't know what else to say about it really.

[Pebbles82]

So sorry - hugs.

[velma]

I'm so sorry. That must have been so upsetting to see. And you're not silly for crying. All of us on here understand how attached you get to something so tiny. I know a lot of (non-hamster) people think "oh, it's just a hamster" but I think we'd all agree all out furries are never "just" anything.

[crazyc4tlady]

Oh i know but I'm just so angry and confused by the whole thing :/ I know I must come across as very irresponsible.
I had such a bond with him, I don't have any blond at all with my Syrian Stanley:/

[Oatmeal_Cupcake]

I'm really sorry for your loss. Don't feel bad for crying your eyes out. You are safe here amongst hamster owners who have shared your pain. We understand that these little beings can steal our hearts. Take your time to mourn him. Things that helped me was writing a letter to my Kit Kat. It helps get closure by writing a letter to them. Crying is also good. I took the creamation path and it really helped me to accept her death so the healing process could begin. I've heard others take the flower pot path. Either way, having a ceremony of some sort helps.

As for the blame, it will take a while to forgive yourself. It's a bit difficult but with time and by talking about it or keeping a journal with your feelings, you will learn to forgive yourself. I still have guilt and blame over Kit Kat death. But it does get easier. Time will heal. And it's not that we forget them, but rather that we accept their passing and forgive ourselves. We find comfort in knowing that we made a difference in their lives and that we gave them a good and loving life. Boris is very grateful for the happy life you gave him. For that reason he would want you to have a happy life as well.

So try a journal, write him a letter, have a little ceremony for his body and talk to people. If you don't have someone close that understands just know that we are here. There are also pet loss hotlines. I used one once and it helped. Those people don't judge and have typically lost pets as well so they know how it feels to lose a fur baby. I'm not familiar with England hotlines. I simply did a Google search for pet loss hotlines.

Don't let yourself flashback to how you found him. That never helped me and only caused more damage. It's better if we remember them as they were in their prime. As for Stanley, he still needs you. I know that you feel like the bond isn't there just yet but just give him a chance. The best way I can describe a bond is by thinking back to your best friend. When you first met them, you were strangers and slowly became friends. It was with time and experiences that a bond grew and so they became your best friend. To me, that's how hamsters work. It's not a "taming" process to me. It's about building trust, getting to know each other and becoming friends.

Again, I'm really sorry for your loss. Have you tried reading the rainbow bridge poem? Rest peacefully little Boris. I send my hugs to you crazyc4tlady during this terrible time of turmoil. May you forgive yourself with time as it mends your heart.

[cypher]

I'm really sorry for your loss, I can imagine how hard this must be for you & you are most definitely not alone in crying your heart out over the loss of a much loved hamster.
Play well at the bridge little Boris.

[aneta]

So sorry to hear that. The only way to heal is by time unfortunately. Also take that as a lesson. To be more careful. And please don't say that you will have no hamsters. If you love them. I can't imagine my life without hamsters now. You took really good care of him and that what matters in the end. Good hammy owner is owner is owner that learns from mistakes and corrects them.
Take care xxxxxxxxx
We are here to support you as well! Remember, please.

[crazyc4tlady]

Thank you so much everyone! I'm trying to to cry again reading your kind words but I just did my makeup and I don't want to ruin it!
I'm really trying to not think about how I found him because as you say, it does make things worse.
I'm coming to terms with the fact that he's gone and that I still have Stanley to care for.
Thank you so much everyone, I am rambling haha

[souffle]

I am so sorry for your loss. He left you a legacy to honour in that you will always take extra care in the future. Never assume anything with animals. They have evolved over a very long time to do what they do and instincts always come through in the end.
Play well at the bridge Boris

[Thin Lizzy]

This is awful! I'm so sorry you had that happen. My thoughts are with you!
Like souffle said never assume anything. I suppose we can never tell with some animals.
There's nothing wrong with having a good cry, we all feel for you.
RIP Little Boris gone too soon xx

[crazyc4tlady]

Thanks, I miss him so much :(
I really want another dwarf but I'm scared they will never be anything like Boris, he was so kind and social, although I never want to replace him!

[Thin Lizzy]

Let yourself grieve Boris, you'll have good days and bad days but, you'll get through this. Remember we're here for you and thinking of you.
Think of all your happy times and memories of Boris. No one can take them away from you.

[crazyc4tlady]

Thanks Thin Lizzy and Everyone actually :)

[LancashireLass]

Hi I'm so sorry to hear about little Boris my thoughts are with you, hugs xxxxxx

Mum to Willow and Ollie

J xxx

[crazyc4tlady]

Thank you LancashireLass, means a lot xx

[bbbarker]

I'm so sorry for the loss of your hammy, try not to beat yourself up about it too much xx

[bbbarker]

I agree with aneta don't let this put you off getting anymore Hamsters, I'm sure you were an amazing owner to Boris and any Hamster would be glad to have you as there mummy xx

[crazyc4tlady]

Thanks bbbarker, Im not saying no to another hamster anymore, although I haven't cleaned Boris's cage yet and I feel so bad whenever I see it that it makes me think, should I really get another?
I know all of my hamsters have been spoilt rotten and looked after so well but there's just so much guilt in me right now :/
I'm feeling better now though, coming to terms with it.

[Flamestriker]

loosing a lilfluffy is alwayws hard, but there is another out there waiting for you. Boris will not be replaced, but the next new fluff will be in addition to, with a different personality

[DrKMcK]

It's always a sad thing when we lose a hammy. It's especially sad and hurtful when another pet is the reason for a hamster's death. As humans, we often forget that animals live in a world dependent on instincts. Our very loved fluffy sweet cat or dog isn't seen by us as what nature created him or her to be...a predator. It isn't evil, although it feels that way. It's an inborn trait that would keep your cat alive if she/he ever got lost. This was an accident, pure and simple. It wasn't your fault and it wasn't your cat's fault. It just was a bad thing that happened. Most of what we hamster folks have learned over the years has been because of the experiences we have had or others have had and have told us about. When an HC member talks about how to keep a cage secure, or talks about keeping other pets away from a hammy, it's usually because we've learned that this is necessary to keep the hamster safe. We don't know it...we learn it from others.
Yes, there are a few cats or dogs, here and there, who are okay with hamsters. But it is really rare. My Yoda wouldn't hurt a hamster. If they get loose, he won't get off my bed. He lets me know where the hammy is. He'll smell them, but if they try to walk on him he jumps off the bed or couch. But I still won't deliberately leave him alone with a hamster. Anything could happen. I've personally never had a cat I would ever have trusted near my hams. I've seen them catch mice too many times to feel my hammies could ever be safe.
I really hope you don't let this stop you from having hamsters. I'm certain any hamster in your home would have cats kept away diligently. And you would be one of the first on a thread to let someone know why cats need to be kept from hamsters.

I once left a cage alone after a hammy death for a month. I just couldn't do it. It was actually finding HC that helped me get over my Coco and adopt Ted E. Bear. That empty cage can be heartbreaking. :-( {hugs}

Play well at the Bridge Boris. Too soon little man...too soon. :-(

[crazyc4tlady]

Thanks so much DrKMcK!
I feel so silly about what I did, I should never have assumed all would be well with my cats but I know I have to learn from this.
Like you said about your cage, I still can't bring myself to clean it, all of his things are still as they were :/
I don't even want to use the cage again for another ham, I just feel like it's Boris' and no one else's ha
I definitely want to get another dwarf, a new cage and everything. I'm worried about not having the bond with a new one like I did with Boris though, I've never had that kind of bond with my Syrians either but I suppose I will have to wait and see :)
Thanks again !

[Thin Lizzy]

DrK always seems to know what to say! I've learned a lot from his posts.
I've learned a lot from this truly wonderful forum.
The great thing is, everyone has learned stuff from others and passed it on.
Crazyc4tlady - you will get that bond again.

[crazyc4tlady]

I agree, I literally have learnt everything I know about hamsters from this forum and I only got my first hamster just over a year ago.
It's really great :)

[essentiallysue]

I know exactly how you feel. A long time ago, I had a precious hammie, also named Boris, I had a number of hammies at the time and kept them in my clothes closet (without the clothes, of course). While I took care of cages, I let one or two cage mates run around on the floor. When I put Boris down for his play time on the floor, I forgot I had not picked up Ruby, who was an aggressive one when she wanted to be. She found Boris and attacked him leaving half of his body gone. I felt horrible. This was my fault. I kept Boris, treating his wound with Camomile gel. He never walked right again, and watching him suffer was so hard. He did heal and lived a while longer. We do make mistakes sometimes and it's hard to let go of the terrible feeling. But your Boris and mine knew how much we loved them. I continued to have hamsters and now I have mice. (I never named another one Boris again though). My Dad taught me when I was young, that when you lose a pet, get another one, it needs you too. But I must say this, if the cat who got your hammie "enjoyed" it, he/she will certainly try again.

[crazyc4tlady]

Oh no that doesn't sound nice :( I did love him a lot and I hope he loved me too!
I know which cat did it.. She's a naughty so and so and the cats haven't been let into the room since it happened. In fact, there is one meowing outside my door now, cheeky thing.
And I completely feel now that even though I still feel it's my fault we all make these mistakes to learn from them!

[crazyc4tlady]

I'm actually only today about to clean his cage out and it's making feel sick having to go and look at it again :(
It's been in the garden with all his things still as they were.

[racinghamster]

Is that wee Boris in your avatar image? If it is, he was lovely. :) Time will heal, believe me, but the cats will have to get used to tough love I`m afraid when you have hamsters. They rely on you to keep them safe from harm. It`s just very unfortunate this happened. I never personally understand why cat owners want to keep small rodents as pets when they have predators in the house, but that said, safety procedures can be put in place, so I`m sure when the time comes, you will be using the cage again and putting it to good use for another needy hamster. I`m sure it`s what Boris would want. x

[crazyc4tlady]

Yeah that's boris, it's pretty recent actually :)
Tbh I completely agree with you. I have no idea what made me want a hamster when I had three cats but now I've had hamsters I don't think I could ever not have them.
I've ordered a Duna Multy for a new little one, but I'm not sure what to do with the old one, it's in storage right now, it will forever belong to Boris in my mind but maybe someone else's little ham would like it xx

[racinghamster]

You follow your heart. I know someone (abroad) through another forum I used to frequent and she recently had a terrible accident by stepping on her gerbil and she had to be put to sleep. These accident just happen sometimes and even with the best intention, can`t be avoided.

Chin up. x

[crazyc4tlady]

Oh god that would be so upsetting!

[Thin Lizzy]

It's good talking about these things, you know you're not alone. On this forum no one judges you, everyone has made mistakes. The important thing is we learn from them.

[LancashireLass]

Thin Lizzy you are so right xxxx